8-25-11
I am still not sure how to go about this writing thing. I am afraid to submit anything because I am afraid it will be bad and then I won’t be able to recover from a bad reputation. I think that it’s a little irrational, but I think I haven’t started because of fear. I also think I should not drink because I need a clear head. I would like to go by a rule of not drinking until I have made enough money to buy it. But I don’t think I will end up sticking to it. I need to do laundry and clean up as well, but I can’t seem to find the motivation. all I really want to do is sleep.
For some reason I think I can drink my problems away, or at least forget about them, but I think drinking creates more, both inside and out. Maybe if I allow myself a week as a vacation, I can get motivation next week to do what I need to do. But I think I gotta stop drinking. I have to put my foot down and at least take a break from it. I think that I would help myself a lot if I didn’t drink for awhile. Maybe ever again.